Dealing with Negativity
Dealing with negativity – ”Oh no! The day has started already!”, ‘’I will never achieve my goals’’, ‘’I don’t want to try anything because I get bored easily’’, ‘’From now on I will rebel against everything’’, ” Life is unfair ” etc… There are so many things that you might be saying to yourself daily and affect your mood and happiness with a huge amount of negativity.
Did you know that many times despite being financially independent, a person can become a slave of negativity because he or she simply not knows how to be dealing with negativity?
Yes, it often happens without realizing that you are stuck in your own mind. That happens unintentionally and despairs you more and more.
Dealing with negativity
The inner voice
Why do you think sadness, depression, boredom, mental fatigue or unhappiness occur? – Because often they come from not knowing how to control negativity. Because, believe it or not, our inner voice has a great power over our personal, daily lives.
It’s hard to believe that a simple voice moves us toward self-destruction and can also take us away to the pinnacle of success. Although it may not always seem like that, you are the creator of your inner peace and happiness.
Human beings are the only ones who can think in complex ways. Unlike animals who simply live and survive according to their instincts, we have much more complexity in our existence.
For example, we are ashamed to walk naked in front of other people because the inner voice begins to attack saying that others will make fun of us and, indeed, they will.
But the inner voice of a stripper model can be a totally different. You may feel comfortable posing in front of cameras. Clearly, that person needed some time to stop self-judgment but he/she got used to it after a while. That being said, we understand that the inner voice can change and start telling us different things than the ones from a few years back and it depends on the environment, personality development, and other factors.
Controlling the negativity has an important advantage – We can destroy it according to our needs
Many people are not even aware that they have a lot of negativity within themselves. They are so immersed in it that the negative thoughts simply cannot leave them. They have become very pessimistic and they can’t prevent it anymore. It is all because of that why their lives are going astray: they are doing drugs, live in a criminal world, feeling miserable, etc. There are so many things that can make us feel bad but we can take the advantage out of it and turn it into something good. It sounds difficult but once you have reached a certain point of your life, you will realize that all the struggles you faced showed you how bad the life can get and how good you can be if you learn how to control your negative thoughts and take control over your life. In that moment, you will be ready to fight against it and destroy the negativity.
Become aware of it
This is the first step but not the only one since there are many people who are fully aware that they have a negative inner voice but do nothing to change it to positive.
They accept their own reality constructed by their minds but do nothing good to change, and that is why often their depressions are much more severe than those who are not aware of it.
If you are this type of person, stop being masochistic and love yourself for God’s sake!
You are as valuable as any other person living on this planet, you’re as smart as the greatest genius and as creative as the best writers. You only have to wake up the positive person inside of you start controlling the negativity, zoom out and be positive.
Examine your thoughts
This is the most difficult part of controlling process.
You may be afraid of something, perhaps speaking in public (which is very common). However, if you analyze your thoughts very well, you will notice that many of your beliefs are not originally yours. This is where you start to control the negativity.
That’s when you realize that you have been influenced by the society. That’s when you realize that your inner voice has been conditioned to think so. You realize that in fact, the decisions you make are not yours. They belong to people in general – your parents, your friends, people who think they know what’s right and what’s wrong.
You’ll realize that many of the thoughts you have currently come from outside and not from within. The hardest part is to control these thoughts that you may have hidden in the depth of your mind.
Remember that nobody knows you better than you do. You are not a bot that should adjust to everyone else just to satisfy their needs. Satisfy yours before anyone else’s! It’s you who struggles with insecurity and negativity. You may not even show them to those that made you think badly about yourself. For this reason, you should try and succeed to get rid of people’s expectations of you and do what makes you happy.
This is the third and final step. There is probably no better remedy to control the negativity as rebelling against yourself.
By this, I mean a healthy and constructive rebellion, to the rebellion that wants to take his/her own way and improve his/her life. You can start with: ‘’Starting today I will do what I really want in life!, Nobody will tell me I that cannot do it, I’m better than I’ve always believed’’.
If you analyze your negativity well, you will understand that most of the problems are caused by thoughts and expectations!
Focus on the good things. Whether it’s about your life, finances, family or your personality, thinking positively will bring you positivity. You should always believe in yourself and eliminate the negative thoughts and anxiety that you deal with every day. You will see how better and easier everything will seem to you very soon and you can start living life without unnecessary bad feelings.
It is time to start enjoying and you deserve it just as everyone else!
We also strongly recommend you to check out Oliver Reichenstein TED Talk: Dealing with Negativity.